So Overwhelmed!

For the past few months I have felt so overwhelmed. As soon as I get up my feet hit the floor at a steady pace and don't stop until I'm back in bed for the night. I go running for some quiet and refreshment, as odd as that may sound to non-runners. 

I really don't have time to be writing this post, but thought maybe putting this down would help ease my overboard mind a little and maybe be encouraging to someone else. My intentions are not to be negative or to nitpick other people's convictions, just admit what overwhelms me so that in the process of writing this post I can just put it to rest and move on.

* I have so many projects I've started around our ranch to help my husband, but just not enough time to finish them when I want. 

* I have so many unorganized files in my computer from my recent transfer to a new one and I can't find anything and it stresses me out. 

* I'm trying to add more inventory to my jewelry shop before Christmas. The summer was too busy to spend the needed time in the house to create and now I feel a time crunch and unbelievable pressure.

* I'm considering dropping portrait photography, and sticking only with fine art landscape and macro. I need to add more items to my Etsy store.

* I'm tired of hearing about how sugar is so bad. The past few years, on my own research of the science of cooking I've put in half the amount of sugar into what I bake, or maybe none at all. But now I feel so guilty for even buying it, or buying the "wrong kind." 

* I'm tired of well meaning people inferring the "advanced medicine" practices that I do are evil.

* I'm tired of Facebook. I love reading the current events in my newsfeed and keeping up with people that live far, but I'm feeling overwhelmed by all of the spiels people get themselves excited about. 

Here is my spiel!

Lord, I'm so overwhelmed! I'm so tired of feeling guilty for living this life YOU have blessed me with. I'm tired of being unintentionally made to feel guilty because I buy canned tomatoes, love sugar and cream in my non-green tea. I'm thankful for powdered substances that are finally helping my son's digestive problems, and a doctor who actually listened to me and cares. 

Lord, I'm so tired of all this nitpicking about food! I'm tired of having to defend how my husband does his part through sweat, freezing cold temperatures, and death to provide his end of food for my world.

Lord, I'm tired of families being broken. I ache so deeply for a 16 year old girl who just lost her mom. I ache for a 28 year old woman who's mother is unwelcoming because she doesn't want to catch her grandson's cold. I ache over misunderstandings, misinformation and lack of communication. 

I feel as if all this is on my shoulders and I. Don't. Want. It. Anymore. 

Here. 

It's Yours. 

I'm going outside now. And I'm just going to enjoy the sunshine while sitting on my garden bench. I will not take any of this weight with me because I can't carry it. 

It now belongs to You.