I'm expecting this to be the blog page with the most hits. :)
Let's face it, who really, deep down, doesn't enjoy Facebook? Staying connected with friends from overseas, sharing pictures with family, keeping in touch with old high school buddies? I was even found by some relatives in Finland that I've never met and now we get to see pictures of each other and learn a little about each others lives! How cool is that?! The only downside is that I don't understand Finnish, so I don't know most of what they're saying. :)
I have felt the need to have to "defend" a few of my guidelines with Facebook.
I don't accept every friend request. Especially from people who live in my small community or close to me. Some people I see every day, why the need to stay connected on Facebook?
Some people I intentionally want to keep the face-to-face communication open and not fall in to the "only communicating online" trap. This doesn't always seem to work as I'd like it to and some might feel slighted and ignored by my not accepting a request, but doesn't that just prove the point? The face-to-face must need working on if feelings are hurt because I haven't "friend-ed" someone on Facebook. Isn't life more important than who are my Facebook friends?
I love seeing pictures of family far away, hearing what missionary friends have been doing, keeping up with people I might not be able to without Facebook.
But, Facebook doesn't limit who my friends are. It does give me a chance to share with those who I might see only once in a lifetime, or witness to someone, or give my brother grief who serves with the Army in S. Korea. But it's not limited to these people.
I'm learning to try to speak positively, and graciously to people. To take some time to think about my response before saying something that I'll regret, or that will make them feel defensive. I know that no matter what I say, someone might take it the wrong way. Especially in typed words when they can't hear the compassion and sincerity in my tone, such as I write now.
I think that Facebook is a good thing, but like any good thing it can also easily be used for harm.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete"If there are bad feelings... good old fashioned open face-to-face communication should be pulled out of the closet."
ReplyDeleteAre then blogger musings more personal than FB?
Today I'm reminded that my longing in love should be to seek the good of others and not just my own:
1 Corinthians 10:23 “Everything is lawful,” but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is lawful,” but not everything builds others up.
1 Corinthians 10:24 Do not seek your own good, but the good of the other person.
1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient, love is kind, it is not envious. Love does not brag, it is not puffed up.
1 Corinthians 13:5 It is not rude, it is not self-serving, it is not easily angered or resentful.
Also, that we must be careful not to elevate our personal or cultural standards or norms to an absolute equal to the Bible and so stand in the place of God to others.
Another person might see things differently, approach communication differently because of their personality or cultural circumstances--whether seen or unseen, considered or hidden. Some people might have more difficulty reaching out in communication, reaching out in a relationship because they feel as if they are a poor communicator, afraid they might offend someone and drive them further away and themselves to be further alienated. Taking no risks leaves nothing to lose right? It may be someone is wrestling with stress or heartache a physical or emotional internal struggle, overwhelmed by responsibilities, or simply a busy parent who still tries to make the time to communicate and connect in whatever small or removed way they can with those they care about. Perhaps it is the taking small steps toward the building or restoration of a relationship. Maybe none of the above, or a collection of many things, how are we to know? Which is best, to have faith in that persons intentions or to be skeptical? In liberty and love to try to understand the perspective of another and make accommodation for their weakness, maybe even be strengthened in our own, or to avoid the face to face and avoid the interaction of any kind for the sake of convenience when more than mere tolerance of existence is demanded of us in Christian love.
sorry about the first deleted comment, there was a significant grammatical error.
ReplyDeletep.s. I'm one of those who feels like I'm a very poor communicator, so please be gracious :)